Being a diabetic athlete I am not only affected physically, but mentally as well. I often get frustrated with the fact that diabetes has a huge affect on my athletic ability, but learning to accept this is just part of the battle.
As described in my blog Sports with Diabetes, I talk about the routine I have in place to make sure my glucose levels are in my preferred range for exercising. But even with this routine, the thought of where my numbers are at is always on my mind. Due to this, I can often get stressed, and even off my mental game which as any sport athlete can greatly affect the way you play.
Imagine heading into a big game, warming up and not knowing if the feeling of your body shaking is because of nerves or because you are getting low blood sugar, which thus means you will not perform as well as you would hope. Then gaining the fear that if your blood sugar is too low you wont even be able to even play. Be warming up and everyone else only has the stress of the game ahead of them, but you have the stress of not only the game, but also diabetes and if your numbers are too high or low, or if they are moving in a direction you really wish they weren't. Imagine working so hard all season to get to your MIAA Championship game at the TD Garden, and a chronic illness that you have been living with could affect your ability to perform to win the state title. A title your team has come so close to for the past three years. Frustrating, right?
In this blog I want to share how I have, and still am, overcoming my struggle of how diabetes has altered my mindset for games and even practicing. As an athlete, you want to block out anything that will throw your game off, but with diabetes this is something you just can't do.
If you are not aware with diabetes as an athlete, here is a small preview. Diabetics have a preferred range their blood sugar should be in, a range they perform best in. If their blood sugar is higher than this range, then their body will let them know. I often get fatigue and headaches. As an athlete, this is super frustrating because it means I am moving slower, which in any sport can hurt your performance. Especially being an ice hockey goalie, it can determine the difference between a save and a goal that can turn the game around. If my blood sugar goes low, I get symptoms of dizziness, shakiness, and blurred vision. Imagine trying to follow a puck, and barely being able to see, tough right?
What I have learned is that, although my athletic ability means so much to me, my health is defiantly more important. It took me so long to recognize this, which sounds crazy but here is why. If I am exercising, and my blood sugar goes low, I am going to have to stop what I am doing to get glucose, and often sit out for 10-15 minutes. If I keep exercising with low blood sugar, it will just keep dropping, thus resulting in extremely low glucose levels, and sometimes even to the point where I could pass out.
Growing up, I remember I would often ignore the symptoms I would be having because I did not want to miss anything in practice or games. I never wanted to sit on the bench and not be there to participate with my team. Or if it came to the end of practice, when my team would have to do sprints, and at this point for already practicing for at least an hour, my levels had started to drop. But I never wanted to sit out because I felt that I was cheating my teammates out. I did not want to watch my team do sprints, while I sat there due to a chronic illness. So instead I get on the goal line with my teammates, doing the sprints as I can barely see and my legs shaking so much that I felt they would give out. This is honestly so dangerous, and I do not recommend others to follow this mentality. It is okay to take a moment to make sure your blood sugar is where it needs to be. Your teammates and coach will totally understand, and if you feel you are cheating your team out, you can always make up the missed workout when you are feeling better.
Even during games when I go low, I need to make sure my health is okay before continuing playing. Being a goalie, it was sometimes difficult to break away from the game to take care of my health, because unlike the players in ice hockey I do not have the ability to be on the bench after each shift. I remember in high school there would be six minutes left in the period, but in ice hockey that could be at least ten minutes with stoppage time; and at that point my blood sugar could drop from 70 to 50. I remember I used to think, its six minutes I can wait that long. But in reality I can't. Playing with low blood sugar is extremely dangerous; your mind is not where it needs to be and you are physically not all the way there, and the situation could just get a whole lot worse if you try to block it out.
I had to learn to communicate the necessary plan of action to allow myself to be healthy. It took me so long to be able to do this because I was nervous my coach would pull me out of the game, or not want to play me in the future because he believed I was not capable. This is extremely frustrating because I wanted to play and be there for my teammates and I did not want a chronic illness to stop me. In reality, it shouldn't. I learned to not be embarrassed by this, and instead planned ahead. I would keep a form of juice and gatorade on the bench so if I felt myself dropping, the supplies would be right there. I learned that during a stoppage of play I could tell the ref "I have Type 1 Diabetes, I need to get glucose from the bench so I can continue to play". They were usually very understanding, and if not my coach would help me out. In high school my coach would either call a timeout or have the back up step in for a moment as I regrouped myself. My coach was very understanding of my situation, and if I was truthful with him about where my numbers were at, he allowed me to hold control of the situation. Due to having diabetes for most of my life I have learned to read my body before I was actually low, which allowed me to take the necessary plan to prevent this low. Meaning I just needed to have some gatorade, or other forms of carbohydrates, and did not have to disrupt the game and could continue playing. I would hope that other diabetic athletes could feel comfortable putting their health before their athletic ability because if you do not the consequences could be greater than missing ten minutes of a game.
Diabetes is always on my mind, I subconsciously know where my blood sugar is or where it is going to be. I have learned to include this in my athletic routine, to allow me to perform my best. Obviously this can be frustrating at times, but you have to understand that it is all part of your life and it is what makes you, you. Being a diabetic athlete is so rewarding because it shows how strong you are. In the past so many doctors told me that playing sports as a diabetic is difficult, and sometimes even impossible, which is completely false! Take it from me, and all the other diabetic athletes around the world; this chronic illness does not stop you from doing what you love, and you should be proud to be an athlete with T1D!
Comments